Friday, September 14, 2012

Donor Sexual

I have been made aware of a man named Trent Arsenault (many thanks, RoyalFirefly!), who refers to himself a "donorsexual".  What the hell?, you may ask.  I also asked this.

Methinks it's a donation of a different kind...

The hell is that 37-year-old Trent donates sperm.  Lots of it.'s, like, what he does.   He's the biological father of over 16 monkeys to date.  He says he feels like it's his calling, seeing as how he's got a huge sperm count (about 4x that of the average American male).  The wrinkle comes in, though, when we find out he's not affiliated with any established sperm bank, and he doesn't charge for his goods.  


Dude advertises his goods in newspapers and online, and couples that either can't afford, or don't like going through a sperm bank, give him a call and say "Let's make a baby!"  They then meet in a hotel, where Trent insists that all his 'customers' sign paperwork relieving him of any and all parental responsibilities, then retreats into the bathroom with a magazine and a sterile cup and then does his thing.  He hands the cup to the lady what wants to get preggo, and leaves the room, leaving her to inseminate herself in a method of her choosing.

The usual way women get pregnant in cheap hotel rooms is off the table...

It gets stranger.  Trent's whole life revolves around being fertile.  He drinks special "fertility shakes," and gets up super early so he can do what he needs to do before the sun comes up, because sunshine kills sperm (while direct sunlight will harm sperm outside of the body, I can't find anything that says it will harm it while it's still inside).  He won't date, because he won't have sex (has never had sex, actually), because it harms his fertility.  He used to "long" for a wife and children of his own, but has decided his donating is more important, and fulfills him completely.

It's too bad, too, because that is a LOOK.

He says he's a virgin, and I'm inclined to believe him.  "By 18 I had made the decision to abstain from sex.  I knew I wanted to be a donor and I wanted to save myself for that," he has said in an interview.   Now, I have no problem with people choosing to be celibate, but I'm a little skeptical about an 18-year-old boy deciding to completely abstain from sex and center his sexuality around the needs and wishes of complete strangers that want nothing more from him than his sperm.

Tell me more about this decision of yours...

Adding to my skepticism is the fact that multiple videos have surfaced of him, er, donating (read: masturbating on camera and then posting it on the internet), and the fact that he was raised by strict religious parents (dad is a Pentecostal minister), who don't talk to him any more because he's a "sinner".  Now, I'm not meaning to knock Pentecostals when I say this, but they're not exactly the most sexually liberated people in the world, and I can't imagine that a Pentecostal kid would have had the latitude to explore his sexuality in any kind of holistic way, even while remaining abstinent.

So I think he's probably running from something he's ashamed of regarding his sexuality.  Maybe he's gay (also not generally accepted in the Pentecostal crowd).  Maybe he's got crappy self-esteem or social anxiety and is too scared to date.  Maybe he's just ashamed of having sexual feelings at all, and only gratifying himself when it's in aid of procreation is a way of mitigating that shame.  Who knows.  But I suspect it's something.  

Nothing derails a life like shame.

When it all comes down to it...I think he's probably doing all of this to avoid some issue within himself.  But you know what?  It's a free damn country.  The FDA is trying to shut his little operation down, saying that he's not complying with the regulations of a sperm bank STI testing, among other things, but he's arguing that he's NOT a sperm bank, just a guy helping people out, and that one of the reasons he never has sex is to avoid the risk of STI altogether, in order to protect his customers.  I can't really see how he's wrong on either count, frankly.

Honestly, this dude doesn't seem to be hurting anyone, and although I don't really believe his stated motives, but it's really none of my business what his motives are.  He's making people happy...I hope he's actually making himself happy, too.

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