Saturday, September 1, 2012

Well, Hello!'s been a while.  Heh.  How the hell are ya?

Mea maxima culpa, even.

Truth is, I've been a busy Chaka.  Turns out, getting a master's degree and prolific blogging are somewhat contraindicated, at least in Chakatown.  But now I'm DONE and one step closer to my goal of world domination.  Or, if that proves to be too burdensome, to at least fill the shoes of one tiny, badass Jewish lady:

Oh, snap - glass of wine with Dr. Ruth is totally going on the bucket list.

Since we last chatted, aside from finishing graduate school, the Manfriend cut off his toe in a truck's hydraulic lift (he's fine now, but seriously, watch your toes on those things.  They'll crush 'em right the hell off and you won't be able to put your foot below your heart for MONTHS.  Trust me on this one), I gained the cutest niece on the planet (like, actually, not just being a biased auntie), and we moved to the suburbs.  Did you know how QUIET it is without junkies and garbage trucks outside your window?!  It's vaguely alarming.

Admittedly more soothing than junkies hocking loogies.

But now I'm back!  It's time for more tidbits and info to make your life more amusing and sexy!  Because who doesn't want more amusing and more sexy?  If it's you, can you tell me why?  Because I don't understand that at all.  

Y U No like funtimes?

For your perusal, to get back into the swing of things, I provide you with the following, which is sexy and amusing, but also kind of creepy as hell.  I present to you, the Zombie Dildo, brought to you by your friends at Fleshlight (be warned: link is hella porny).  Is that what it's supposed to be?

The zombie craze has reached every corner of the market, I see.  Well, to each her own, I guess.  Or his own, for that matter, because I'm pretty sure zombie cock is no bigot, so long as you've got BRAINZ to eat.  But...did they, like, STUDY actual rotting penises?  Because someone put in some serious detail there.  

Fleshlight has a whole "freaks" series of toys for your masturbatory amusement...Frankenstein (though, isn't that kind of the same thing as a zombie, only with bolts?),  Dracula, a cyborg (tee hee), and for the mens, even an alien yoni!  FUN!  

Welcome back to the 'Box!