Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Porn for the Blind

I was reading fourfour today, (a hilarious blog, provided you enjoy smush-faced kitties and pop culture) and came across a link I couldn't help but click:


It's a list of links to verbal descriptions of pornography websites. In theory, this is a great idea - just because a person can't see porn doesn't mean the don't want to enjoy it. However, when I clicked the links, the resulting audio was so unsexy, and so entirely missed the point of porn, that I find the whole thing suspect.

First and foremost, the people reading these have absolutely no sex or passion anywhere in their voices. Every voice sounds either bored or embarrassed to be reading. And the language is so clinical that they might as well be reading the technical manual for a dishwasher. I'm not blind, but I think I can speak for people who are when I say "Uh, now the woman is rubbing her breasts and touching her vagina" does not inspire me to rub one out.

like this, only louder and less sexy

I'm guessing college students or bored web designers are having some fun. Or it's some kind of art/sociology/whatever project.

If you're blind and reading this through adaptive technology, or you're close to someone who's blind, and you think I don't know what I'm talking about, please let me know - I'm very curious to have my suspicions confirmed or denied. And if you're looking for some naughty audio for yourself (or for a special sightless someone) that is actually sexy, give this (NSFW) site a try.

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