Friday, September 24, 2010

British Spies are SMART

I've already admitted that I rather fancy the Brits.  I like their accents and I like their television (which is always so much better than the American remakes), and I like looking at their princes.  Not that they don't have their problems (we can talk about the deeply ingrained racism and classism another time), and it's not like they didn't act like dicks running around colonizing everything for about a jillion years, but I have an uncanny ability to romanticize things when I want to.

A typical Tuesday night in a typical British household

I was sent something this morning (by two different people - my first double submission! Yay!!) that further deepened my love for all things British.  Apparently, in WWI, a clever and think-out-of-the-box MI-6 (British intelligence agency) agent came up with an ingenious invisible ink: spooge.

There is no such thing as a SFW picture of semen.  Trust me on this one.

It was able to withstand most of the state-of-the-art invisible ink detection methods of the time, and, as the Daily Telegraph beautifully put it, "had the advantage of being readily available".

It was not without problems - the poor guy who came up with the idea (whose name was, I kid you not, Mansfield Cumming) had to be switched to a new office because everyone started ragging on him for knowing that semen makes good invisible ink.


There was also at least one guy who had to be reminded that he shouldn't be storing his, um, ink - only fresh media was to be used.  This was precipitated by the fact that bad guys tend to get suspicious if blank sheets of paper that smell like that one special sock they used as teenagers keep getting intercepted in the mail. 

fresh seamen only, please

Do they even use invisible ink anymore?  Do you think that in today's digital age, male ejaculate has lost it's place in Her Majesty's official arsenal?  I totally dare someone to ask her.  Not that she'd actually know, but wouldn't her face be priceless?  Anyone who can bring me pictures of that conversation gets a Chakabox t-shirt in their choice of stylish colors.

Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha...I shall have you killed for your insolence!

Thank you, CF and JP for sending this jewel in the crown my way!!

1 comment:

  1. I hear you sista! And Anglophilism is compounded all the more when one is the progeny of an ex-pat, let me tell ya.