As If AIDS Weren't Enough of a Nightmare

These creep me out in deep, deep places, but I dig them so much. Those Europeans...so edgy.

"Without condoms, it's AIDS you make love to. Protect yourself."

These have garnered some criticism from HIV advocates, namely that comparing HIV+ people to poisonous invertabrates is not the most sensitive campaign idea in the world. However, they do admit the posters are very eye-catching, and probably do much more good than harm.

GAH. So scary.

Porn for the Blind

I was reading fourfour today, (a hilarious blog, provided you enjoy smush-faced kitties and pop culture) and came across a link I couldn't help but click:

Pornfortheblind.org

It's a list of links to verbal descriptions of pornography websites. In theory, this is a great idea - just because a person can't see porn doesn't mean the don't want to enjoy it. However, when I clicked the links, the resulting audio was so unsexy, and so entirely missed the point of porn, that I find the whole thing suspect.

First and foremost, the people reading these have absolutely no sex or passion anywhere in their voices. Every voice sounds either bored or embarrassed to be reading. And the language is so clinical that they might as well be reading the technical manual for a dishwasher. I'm not blind, but I think I can speak for people who are when I say "Uh, now the woman is rubbing her breasts and touching her vagina" does not inspire me to rub one out.

like this, only louder and less sexy

I'm guessing college students or bored web designers are having some fun. Or it's some kind of art/sociology/whatever project.

If you're blind and reading this through adaptive technology, or you're close to someone who's blind, and you think I don't know what I'm talking about, please let me know - I'm very curious to have my suspicions confirmed or denied. And if you're looking for some naughty audio for yourself (or for a special sightless someone) that is actually sexy, give this (NSFW) site a try.

Answerbox: Penis, Uninterrupted (Scientific Yet NSFW Pics Ahead!)

I got an email in the Answerbox the other day from a person who had just started dating an uncircumcised man for the first time, and wasn't quite sure what to do once his pants came off. In response, I give you an introduction to penises as nature makes 'em!

Men are born with a foreskin, which is a 2-layered fold of skin that covers the glans, (head) of a flaccid penis. Because most adult men in America today (65%-80%) have had their foreskin removed (been circumcised or 'cut'), many Americans have never seen an intact penis. This here is an example, for the uninitiated:

The outer layer of skin is, obviously, a continuation of the shaft's skin. The inner side is a mucous membrane, like the inside of the mouth or inner folds of a woman's yoni. When the penis becomes erect, the foreskin essentially turns inside out, exposing this more tender skin, as well as the head of the penis:

Where are all the not-porny pictures of non-white penises?! This irks me.

There are some foreskins that don't retract all the way back during an erection, and these can usually be manually retracted, or not, depending on a man's preference. Guys will know from solo efforts how best to handle the situation. If it just won't retract, no matter how he or you try, he may have a condition called phimosis, and should at least talk with a healthcare professional, especially if it would be the first time doing so. He may need medical intervention (though not necessarily).

To maintain a healthy uncircumcised penis, it needs to be kept clean (which can be said for any penis) and protected by condoms with new sex partners. Condoms are especially important because the mucous membrane makes uncut penises much more susceptible to STDs. This increased STD risk is one of the arguments made for circumcision, but the whole circumcision argument is something for another day.

From a partner perspective (which is the only perspective I've got, being female and all), I've found there's not much difference between intact and circumcised once a guy's standing at attention. The skin on the shaft of an erect uncircumcised penis slides up and down a lot more, condom technique varies slightly, and uncut penises tend to be more sensitive at the tip. Other than that, they're really very similar, and each is a treat in its own way!

penis treat!

Finally, if you have questions about any given unit, the absolute best person to ask is the guy attached to it. You can make it sexy and fun: start out gently, asking "do you like this?" while lightly touching him. Then just keep trying stuff ("...what about this? This?") until you get the hang of it. Don't be shy - there isn't a man out there that doesn't like undivided attention paid to his penis, especially when it's in an effort to pleasure it more effectively.

So, here's to the ever-fashionable Snake Sweater! Leaving penises intact is becoming more and more common in the US, so it's wise for young folks (or those with a taste for young men) to have a familiarity with what's coming up on deck. Thanks for your contribution, Answerbox submitter - now go get some with confidence. Have fun!!

Do you have a question for the Answerbox? Click here, or at the top of the page and ask away. All questions will be answered, and all names will remain 100% confidential!

Words = Potential Lifesavers

Several years ago, my good friend Alexis was working in Mumbai doing HIV/AIDS education amongst poor women, because she's rad like that. One day, while sitting in an internet cafe, an Indian man at the next computer spoke to her:

"Sister, what are you doing here in India?" (Alexis is very clearly not Indian)

"I'm teaching women about HIV and AIDS."

"Oh, I am so glad you are here! I was with a prostitute last night, and I am worried that I could have gotten AIDS. Can you tell me if I am in danger?"

"Did you use a condom?"

"Oh yes, I always use a condom with prostitutes. But I kissed the woman on the mouth. Am I in danger?"

"Well, it's very good that you always use condoms with prostitutes, and you should keep doing that. It is very unlikely that you could have gotten HIV from a kiss. But I will suggest that before you get married, you get tested, to make sure you and your wife are safe."

No hesitation, no embarrassment, no judgment. And I love how she connected getting tested for HIV with his responsibility as a husband - people will often do something for a partner that they won't do for themselves. She gave factual, relevant information in an open and honest way that very well may have saved lives.

For that, and countless other things, including once saying "If I had $5 for every boy I deflowered, I could buy a sweater at the Gap", Alexis will always be a winner here at Chakabox.

Alien Sex Shouldn't be Boring

I saw Avatar a couple nights ago. Visually, it was absolutely stunning - even breathtaking in a couple of spots. It's so beautiful (especially in 3D) it's even worth the inflated entrance price to see it in a theater.

The story, though, was only OK. Don't get me wrong, it's fun and all, but it had some issues, even for a frothy action movie. It was heavy handed, one-dimensional and about 25 minutes too long. And oh, so predictable.

Because it's so predictable, it's not a surprise (nor is it a spoiler to read here) that the 2 sexy sparkly blue heroes end up boning under some (frickin' gorgeous) magical trees. What was a surprise (and a disappointment) was that the scene was BORING.

James Cameron was inventive enough to create a world with floating mountains, glowing whirligig lizards and a humanoid species that communicates with trees (and rainbow dinosaur birds and 8-legged horses) via ponytail tentacles, but he can't think up a love scene more interesting than "pretty blue chick sits on pretty blue guy and they smooch"?! Yer slippin', Cameron.

I'm not looking for Hentai tentacle porn or anything...we are talking PG-13, after all. But this is imaginative PG-13 alien sex:

This is boring PG-13 alien sex:

And I'm sorry, when you have a $250 million budget, the best digital filmmakers in the world, 15 years to write a script and the most romantikest omgponies!!1! movie ever under your belt, I expect a bit more than a hug under a glowing tree. I mean, the tepid hand-on-the-foggy-car-window bit was sexier than this.

But, I am admittedly picky about such things, so I recommend you go see Avatar anyway. Do it before it's out of theatres and there's not much point in seeing it anymore. It's a treat for the eyeballs, if not the brain...and in this case, size does matter.

Hopes for the Future, Which is Here All Of A Sudden

Holy crap, it's the FUTURE! 2010! There's nothing like the dawn of a new decade to inspire hopes for what's to come, and here's what I'm aiming for, at least in the realm of sexytime!

1. The Return of Comprehensive Sex Education

We can now promise to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth!

Since the mid 2000s, the rates of teenage pregnancy and STD acquisition have been rising, despite a steady decline during the 2 previous decades. Why, you may ask? Just one reason, as far as I (and these folks and also these) are concerned: abstinence-only sex education in public schools. Instead of giving young people factual information about the risks and benefits of sexual activity, an entire generation of Americans had extremist conservative morality slimed all over them in the guise of 'education'. Happily, this dream is on the way to coming true: the federal education budget has been re-written by the Obama administration to give funding to 'evidence-based models' of sex ed. Hallelujah.

2. Relationship Equality

Brad and George: live long and prosper!!

Unsurprisingly, I believe that same-sex couples should be able to legally commit to each other, file their taxes jointly, build homes together, and get through nasty divorces as better people in the end, just like heterosexual folks. Personally, I'd vote that 'marriage' be left to houses of worship and 'civil union' become the norm for legalizing coupledom for homos and heteros alike, but that may be too much for the tradition-loving USofA. But really, it's time for this "those men/women love and make each other happy and that is somehow threatening to me" nonsense to end. It's just old.

3. The Sexualization of Children Will Be Creepy Again

Slut dolls are CREEPY.

Bratz Dolls will be melted down to make disposable single-dose vaccine delivery systems for developing countries. Tarting up 16 year olds while shoving their virginity down our throats will cause the spontaneous combustion of PR companies. Glitz Pageants will outlawed as child prostitution. Gossip Girl will go off the air. And I will never, ever hear the word 'sexting' again.

4. Eradication of HIV/AIDS. And Herpes. And Syphilis. And Gonorrhea....

If syphilis and gonorrhea were actually this cute, maybe they wouldn't have to die.

Be it through prevention, a successful vaccination programs or the discovery of cures, I want this crap gone. You can help make my dreams come true!! Get tested, use protection, and volunteer, donate!

I believe!! I believe!! I believe that these things will happen, and that there will also be a space elevator. Because that would be so, so cool.

No Babies: The Pill

The first birth control pill was FDA approved for use as a contraceptive in 1960. By 1964, 25% of all American couples were using them as their primary method of contraception, and today they are the most commonly used method of birth control in the US. Many people credit the introduction of The Pill as the start of the sexual revolution.

you say you want a rev-o-lu-shu-uu-uun...

Most birth control pills are comprised of a combination of two hormones: estrogen and progestin, though some contain progestin only. These hormones prevent the ovaries from releasing eggs, so when spermies show up, there's nothing for them to fertilize. They also thicken cervical mucus (to make it harder for spermies to swim) and thin the uterine lining (so if on the off-chance something is fertilized, there's no soft warm place for it to latch on to and grow into a person.)

The Pill (of which there are a zillion brands to choose from) comes in monthly packs that cost between $15-$50. The packs usually contain 28 active pills and 7 placebo pills, which allow for a menstrual period each month. Some newer pills, though, come in packs without placebo pills, with the intention of reducing the number of periods women have each year, which I think is rad.

Birth control pills are taken once a day, and should be taken at the same time every day. This is super important, because each pill is formulated to work for 24 hours, and 24 hours only. A delay in replenishing the medication, even of just a few hours, can conceivably leave the body unprotected. If a pill is skipped, or more than a few hours late, it should be taken as soon as its remembered, and a backup method should be used for the rest of the month. It's a drag, but it's the reality.

There are considerable side effects of The Pill, though not all of them are considered negative. Happy side effects include a reduction in facial and body acne, the regulation of wacky menstrual cycles and the reduction in severity of menstrual cramps. They can also reduce the risk of Pelvic Inflammatory Disease, which is something I did not know! I love learning new things!

On the negative end of the side effect train are weight gain (about 5lb., on average), nausea and vomiting, mood alteration, reduction in sex drive and vaginal lubrication, bleeding between periods, and an increased risk for blood clots and stroke, especially in women who smoke cigarettes or have certain kinds of migraine headaches.

It's very important that all your healthcare providers knows you're taking birth control pills, as there are medications (like some antibiotics and anti-depressants) that can kill the efficacy of The Pill.

So, it's not right for everyone (I, for example, have experienced every single negative side effect of every pill I've ever tried), but birth control pills are crazy effective and very safe. If your bod can handle the side effects, and your brain can remember to take them on time, it's an excellent, safe and extremely popular choice for No Babies!